My Darling Bug,
I don't even know where to start this letter... as I feel you with me all the time and thus "talk" to you constantly. I'll be out shopping and I'll see something that I want to buy you or that I want you to see. I'll be at the beach and find the perfect shell for you. I know you see all this from Heaven.
Not a day goes by when I don't miss you. At times I still wake up for what would be your 2am feeding. I see other babies learning to crawl, walk, talk, having birthdays, etc and it hurts me so much that I will never see that with you.
But then I think about all the joy you have brought and still bring to me. I remember seeing your first "baby pic" at 8 weeks. I remember the first time you kicked. And how you loved "swinging from my ribs" every night while mommy was trying to fall asleep. Oh and how could we forget the nights you decided you wanted hamburgers at 12am? Poor daddy... having to get up and cook for us. And just think of the money Don Pablos is saving now that we're not eating up all their hot sauce.
I have your picture up on the piano ( you probably know this) and I look at it every day. I am so proud to be your mommy. I brag about you all the time and tell your stories to anyone who will listen.
I often wonder how you are doing? I know you have many Angel friends to play with. I do hope you've gotten my gift of popularity and not your daddy's knack of unintentionally pushing people away. He's working on that though. I pray that you are happy, and that you've found all your family members up there to help you out. I'm sure my cats , Donut and Pepper, won't leave your side. :-)
I know that one day, I will be able to hold you again. That knowledge helps keep me going. I also know that you are watching over us. I know you've seen that things haven't been all happy with your father and I, but I know, also, that you know our love for you and that nothing will ever change that. I know the love, hugs and kisses that your daddy and I send up to Heaven reassure you of that strong love all the time.
I'm going to end this letter to you now. I love you, my little Bug. More than anything. You will always be my heart and soul. One day, I will hold you again.
I love you,
Your Mommy

With Love, From Shady & Skylier

February 25, 2003

Dear Bug,
I know you've been having lots of fun playing with all your Angel friends. I just wish I was able to see you playing. I know that one day I will.
Thank you so much for sending mommy and daddy your little brother or sister and for being such a good Guardian Angel for us. I know its the mommies job to watch over her child and I long for the day when I'll be watching over you instead of you watching over us. I hope you are still able to see the love that daddy and I have for you. I hope you dont feel sad watching all the preparations for Duece. I know that we can afford a lot of stuff this time around, that we couldn't afford for you. That often makes me feel guilty. But then I think of all the love and Angel Hugs and kisses, we send up to you daily and I know that you understand, because you have the most important thing any child could want.... you have mommy and daddys love.
Your picture is still at my desk at work. It keeps moving from desk to desk, right along with me. I couldn't imagine sitting through a day of work without my Bug.
I love you, baby!!!

Love,
Mommy